Disclaimer: I'm not Bellesario or CBS, so I don't claim to own them.
Characters: Tony; Abby
Word Count: 1,000
Setting: Post- Judgment Day
Note: Title of M*A*S*H episode 09x02 inspired this fic...
Series: Letters to Home
Crossposted: ncisfanfic; ncis_fic
Summary: He kept his promise while serving his duty as Agent Afloat.
To My Mistress of the Dark,
Did you get my postcards? I'll try to get one a day out to you, but it may be hard to come up with a new postcard some days. The first port I do a threat assessment for, I'll be sure to grab enough to last 'till the next time.
And don't get too use to me writing you. It's just the first day and all and, well, you made me promise, so I am. But I'm not going to keep it up. Postcards yes, letters no. Just don't have a whole lot to say.
Did you have any problems with my apartment? I left messages for the landlord, but I wasn't sure he got them. If you're still having trouble, get Gibbs to go threaten the guy.
Be sure to put a little superglue on Probie's keyboard one day. Don't want him getting untrained without me there.
Abs? Can you do me one favor? Keep an eye of the boss-man for me. He needs someone watching his six.
I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!
NCIS isn't right. Things are so wrong that even babies have started protesting. I didn't have anything for Gibbs when he showed up. That never happens. Can you come home? Please?
You know that Gibbs will get you back, right? It's just… It's just taking time. Mr. Toothpick is an ass and I don't care if this is read by someone else and they see me calling the director of NCIS an ass. Because he is. Is it bad that I want him to choke on one of those toothpicks? Probably. But I don't care.
We all miss you. Even Gibbs. He's not even growling. He's gone completely quiet. Kinda like when Kate died only different. Don't die out there, Tony. I don't think any of us could handle it if something happened and we weren't there to help.
I should have sent Bert with you. You need someone to keep you company.
Hugging You Bunches,
Dear Ms. Monroe,
Bert would be cool, but I'd rather have some pictures of that lovely goth body you have. Need something to keep me warm at night on a ship full of men and women I can't touch. And did I say men? Forget that was there.
Don't let Gibbs get too depressed. Talk to Ducky. He should be able to help on that front. It's hard to figure out what to do for a depressed Gibbs. If I think of something, I'll let you know.
How's Sister Rosita and the girls? Tell them I'm sorry I'll miss the league finals. Maybe you could record it for me?
Gotta go. Just heard a rumor about a poker game. Life at sea is grand…
Thinking of You,
I thought about sealing this with a kiss, then realized that would be very, very bad. So consider yourself good and kissed.
And what's this about men? Are you holding out on me Anthony DiNozzo? You have a lot to answer to when you get home. And we are so going clubbing at a few places that I haven't taken you before because I wasn't 100% sure.
Sister Rosita sprained her ankle again. The other girls are talking about preventive measures. Since you aren't here, we'll have to find a different substitute. Think Gibbs might do it? Maybe it would help with his funk. I'll get doctor's advice from Ducky.
Oh! Everything at Casa de Tony is in shipshape condition. I might have cleaned. Just a little. But I think you'll be okay with it. I think Gibbs stops by and checks it too.
Watch out for those poker players, they can be dangerous if you get between them and the pot.
Dear Little Miss Nosy,
Didn't I tell you to ignore that part? I guess I should have started a new letter instead of sending that one. We'll talk about the clubs. Okay?
Poker players are the only form of entertainment I have on this godforsaken ship. I'm beginning to suspect some prescription drug smuggling from the infirmary, but I'm still putting some evidence together on that.
Give Sister Rosita a hug for me. And I think, if you can talk him into it, it would do Gibbs good to get out and let his hair down. As much as Gibbs can that is. He hasn't killed one of the replacements, has he?
Hey, I'm putting another letter with this one. Make sure it gets to the right place for me?
You sent a letter to Gibbs! I pinky swear that I didn't read it. I just gave it to him. But you have to tell me what you said in it. He seems… I guess you could say happier. I think I saw him smile yesterday when he walked in the lab and saw your picture.
Oh! You should see my wall. Everybody has their own section. Tim's isn't very big, because I still see him. And Ziva wasn't Kate, but I still gave her space. You… You got a whole wall. I even dug up some pictures from your college days. It's amazing what you can find online and let me tell you… You were one hot frat boy, Sex Machine. Grrrr!
Do you think you'll ever get time for a sat video link? I want to see the real you, not a picture.
I promise to tell you what I said when I'm back home. And it's good to hear he smiled.
A whole wall? Should I be scared? I mean, you didn't do that for Gibbs when he was in Mexico. You just had his picture on all the monitors. Wait. You aren't doing that with me are you? Right?
Take care of everyone for me…